Kind of weird

I discovered love the other day. Turned out it was inside me the whole time. Weird.
-Here's a summary of what happened. It was December 30th in the evening. Christmas Break had been on for a while. Dad was in the garage playing vbdaleks. Micah was in his room with Brian playing RunEscape (I like to write it that way, for no really good reason). Mom was at work or something. I had been reading Blindness for about six hours that day to get finished with it. I was sitting on the recliner in the living room. I had nothing to do. It was already dark outside, or I would've probably taken a walk. From my room the internet was calling: "I'm an easy way to waste several hours until you feel tired enough to go to bed." I ignored its plaintive cry; I take great care to do something with my time besides waste it. I was understandably burnt out on reading, so I didn't pick up my Walden. So here I was on the recliner. I started throwing loose change at the garage door and Micah's door, for no reason that I could have explained. Having exhausted any potential for fun in that, I sat back down on the recliner. Suddenly it struck me that what I had on my hands here was an overpowering sense of loneliness. I don't remember whether I said it aloud: "I need a girlfriend."
-I never would have believed it. I never really pictured myself as the romantic type; in fact, you may recall words I wrote to that effect right here a while ago. I never thought I needed any people. I was a happy introvert. But now here I was confronted with an undeniable truth I'd just pulled out of somewhere inside of me. It was a bit unsettling. Sitting there, I started to understand all these things that people say. "Love makes the world go 'round." "All you need is love." I wondered if I would start liking all those songs by new bands that have no interesting rhythms but rather a mellow person playing guitar and singing calmly about love, but then I concluded that most probably I will always hate those songs. However, the simple fact remains that I "need somebody to love," as it was said by, apparently, "Jefferson Airplane". I still have yet to take decisive action. But now I know I will.
-So, now that I've briefly gone all emo on you, let's get back to my gruff and callous exterior demeanor and talk about something else, shall we? For example, why I've let you down and not posted? Well, mostly it's because this has been midterm week. This didn't worry me so much as it did my friends. Bryce and Aaron both rented me as a tutor for math, because they've been slacking in a way heretofore inconceivable to man. I helped Bryce on the weekend; taught him how to do all that fun stuff: derivatives of trigonometric functions, logarithmic differentiation, implicit differentiation, and the like. I earned the handsome sum of $20. I went to Aaron's yesterday and showed him all that and also more, because he's been slacking for a little while longer than Bryce and thus needed to start as far back as the chain rule. But he seemed to be getting a pretty good handle on it. I mentioned that Bryce paid me $20 for my help. He pointed out, correctly, that I hadn't told him I wanted money. However, I never told Bryce either, and he paid out of the goodness of his heart, without my even having thought of asking. Dear Abby: how do I politely tell my friend that I want money? Second question: I put my name out through the school to do math tutoring, and today Mrs Counts from the school gave me the name and number of a girl who wants help, and told me I should call her mom. She said I would most probably make money off the deal. How do I phrase my request, and what's a reasonable price? The $20 Bryce gave me seems rather generous to set as a standard.
-Exam week went fine, by the way, but the math exam had clearly too many questions. Luckily Mr Rahn didn't care that we stayed after the exam time was over. There was some stuff on there that we haven't touched on for a long time, and I bet Bryce and Aaron probably didn't get those questions, because it's old slacking, and we didn't cover it. Though, who knows? They aren't, in fact, incompetent, so they may have done it. They didn't seem too unconfident when turning the exams in.
-You've had enough of listening to my problems and questions and stuff. I can tell by the strand of drool running down your chin - aght, it just fell off onto your shirt. You can go do whatever else you were going to do now. Make yourself a dessert. Check your e-mail. Pour yourself a tall boy. Whatever.
P.S. If you want to play vbdaleks, you'll probably need to get a few .dll's from www.dll-files.com. That's just the way it seems to go.